Sunday, January 25, 2009

25 Random things about me....

.....I keep getting these emails about the 25 random things, a little silly - but I thought I would just post mine here and shoot 25 birds with one stone.

1. I love my church, family, and of course Jesus
2. I was born in Mississippi
3. I'm named after my Grandmother
4. I was a brownie thru a senior girl scout and can build a fire in the pouring rain - just ask Drason
5. My favorite color is metal flake dark blue (especially on a 1968 Convertible GTO)
6. I went to college in Missouri ( for about 1 semester :)
7. I have owned 1 car for every year I have had my drivers licence - 2 ford tempos, a dodge intrepid, a 69 chevelle, a dodge dakota, a dodge ram, a mercury sable station wagon, a ford taurus, a chevy suburban, a dodge durango, and 2 chevy impala's
8. My first job was at Wendy's
9. I studied Spanish for 4 years and I can understand Spanish, but can't speak it very well
10. I was trained as an operatic soprano for 4 years - I can sing French, Italian, and German love songs
11. Drason and I will be married 10 years in April
12. I've been to Kenya and want to go back
13. I am the oldest of 4 siblings, my youngest sister is only 17
14. My favorite pizza is Hawaiian - lite sauce - from Donatos
15. I used to counsel adult male felons - by myself, with one other staff member in the building
16. Needless to say,You don't scare me, I can kick your butt
17. Before that I was a mental health case worker - I visited mentally ill people in their homes, by myself.
18. I also went to school for marketing and worked for the American Motorcyclist Association - helping them market memberships (mostly to 40 year old men and lesbians.)
19. Anastasia is my favorite movie
20. I have monkey toes
21. I trained and showed horses until I went to college
22. I was an alternate on a synchronized swimming team
23. I met Chris Rice after a campus concert when I was in college
24. I can play the clarinet - very well, alto saxophone - acceptably, and peck at the piano
25. I loved being a counselor - but I love writing music and being a mom a thousand times more!

Friday, January 23, 2009

Oscar the grouch

Yesterday I had a melt down, full on, bring out the Kleenex, don't try to talk sense to me, meltdown. It happens.
I could make a list that was a mile long of all the complaints I had about everything, yesterday. Today, however; it doesn't seem so bad, I actually feel kind of silly.
Drason does a computerized journal of his quiet times - this is a great idea - I asked him if I could share his entry for today and he agreed, so here it is - Drason's debut posting on the blog:)
I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

"1 Peter 4
7The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray. 8Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. 9Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. 10Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. 11If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.

The end of all things is near. What an understatement.

I wonder as he was writing these words when he thought the end would be.

How often do we grumble. We grumble about our bosses, our spouses, going to practices, going to church, etc...As humans we grumble a lot. Why? Because we are selfish. We need to learn not to grumble. Grumbling is one of those sins that people don't really think about but is pervasive. So what if I grumble about having to go to the store today, I'm not hurting anyone. You are hurting yourself. Grumbling takes away the joy God intends for you. If you are grumbling about going to the store, look at it a different way. You have money to go to the store right? You're not going hungry. Praise God on the good not the bad. You might say then, well I'm not like that, I have little money so I can't see the good in that. Well, it will be easier for you to not sin. Look at all the places in the Bible it talks about the wealthy not getting into heaven. That is one less temptation in your life. Praise God.

Grumbling is one of those very little sins that I talked about a couple of days ago that just multiplies over time to completely defeat you. You don't see it coming because it is so small, but just like a few snowflakes can start an avalanche a little grumbling can overwhelm you. Look at people you see that have a bad outlook on life, for me I will use myself circa one year ago. They are always grumbling, thinking the worst about everyone, never truly happy. Do you think they wanted to be that way? NO! After a time all of the little grumblings added up.

Grumbling is akin to frustration. It causes a little loss of joy a little at a time. Every time you grumble about something it makes you life less enjoyable. So what do I do? I either do what I am grumbling about and find a reason to rejoice in it, see getting my joy back, or don't do it. It would be better not to do it and not grumble about it than to lose the joy God intends for me. What if it is something I have have to do? Then I better try real hard to find the rejoicing part. The good news is the Holy Spirit will help us find it.I have come a long way in my grumblings, but I still have a long way to go."

Drason

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Let it snow!!!!









I really like the snow - here are some pictures out the windows of the house.
Challenge of the day - identify my driveway in any of the pictures :)

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Teach me to Praise

When you see me, sitting here in chains
Will my life have been in vain
Because I didn’t praise your name

When you come and shake these prison walls
Will I have given You my all
So someone else might hear Your call

Come and shake me
Make me Holy
Come and find me
Teach me to praise

Come and break me
Make me Holy
That I might worship
Praise your name

When I see You at the midnight hour
Will I still call out
Will I lift up Your name and shout

Can I see Your hand in everything
The blessings that you bring
Oh, can You teach my heart to sing

Come and shake me
Make me Holy
Come and find me
Teach me to praise

Come and break me
Make me holy
That I might worship
Praise your name

Come and shake me
Make me Holy
Come and find me
Teach me to praise

Come and break me
Make me holy
That I might worship
Praise your name

Oh, Lord teach my heart to praise You, even in the darkest night
Oh, Lord use this suffering to bring light, to bring light

Come and shake me
Make me Holy
Come and find me
Teach me to praise

Come and break me
Make me holy
That I might worship
Praise your name

Thursday, January 8, 2009

song =]

Locked away in guilt and fear
I never had a prayer
A lifetimes worth of burdens
Only You could see me there

Walking though this life of darkness
A soul so lost in pain
But from the day you reached for me
I’ve never been the same

Grace set me free
Your grace is wonderful
You have made the broken, completely whole
Grace Set me Free
Your Grace is Beautiful
And I never even knew I was in need until
Grace set me free

Now I can’t say that trials
Have never come my way
Or that everyday was perfect
When I knelt down to pray

But when the storm was blowing
I still could feel your hand
Guiding me in motion
Toward the Promised Land

Grace set me free
Your grace is wonderful
And You have filled a part of me that was not whole
Grace Set me Free
Your Grace is Beautiful
And I never even knew I was in need until
Grace set me free

Bridge
When I was bound by chains so strong I had no hope
Your grace on Calvary; unbound, they have no hold – oh

Jesus, your Grace set me free
Your grace is wonderful
And You have filled a part of me that was not whole
Grace Set me Free
Your Grace is Beautiful
And I never even knew I was in need until
Grace set me free

Praise your name, oh Lord, Your grace set me free

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Lordship and first loves

Acts 14:21-28
21 After preaching the Good News in Derbe and making many disciples, Paul and Barnabas returned to Lystra, Iconium, and Antioch of Pisidia, 22 where they strengthened the believers. They encouraged them to continue in the faith, reminding them that we must suffer many hardships to enter the Kingdom of God. 23 Paul and Barnabas also appointed elders in every church. With prayer and fasting, they turned the elders over to the care of the Lord, in whom they had put their trust. 24 Then they traveled back through Pisidia to Pamphylia. 25 They preached the word in Perga, then went down to Attalia. 26 Finally, they returned by ship to Antioch of Syria, where their journey had begun. The believers there had entrusted them to the grace of God to do the work they had now completed. 27 Upon arriving in Antioch, they called the church together and reported everything God had done through them and how he had opened the door of faith to the Gentiles, too. 28 And they stayed there with the believers for a long time.

In chapter 15 Paul and Barnabas are sent to Jerusalem as delegates of their church on a matter of the law vs grace, and afterwards are sent back to the same church.

The day after they get beat up, Paul and Barnabas go to Derbe and make many disciples. What a short little sentence to describe such a trip. Isn't it funny how the the bad experience warranted half a chapter of the Bible, and the good only half a sentence. The other half of that sentence says they went back through all the places where they had had trouble and preached again to the believers - encouraging them to keep the faith and to endure the trials in their lives - including persecution.
It is easy for me to think that the writer got it wrong here, that he should have spent more time talking about all the great conversions in Derbe, but I know that is not the case. So why such a big difference? Maybe it is so that we will see the example that Paul and Barnabas set - so that we won't take out of context the rejoicing and the conversion of the Derbites and only focus on that. We serve God not the joys of men, we seek to do His will, not just live on the mountain top. This is a hard passage for me because it focuses on the suffering for Christ.

Then it comes in with a one two punch and says - "Paul and Barnabas also appointed elders in every church. With prayer and fasting, they turned the elders over to the care of the Lord, in whom they had put their trust." So not only do we suffer, but now we have to trust God with things beyond our control - we have to turn leadership and Lordship over to Him. They appoint elders and then they let it go and let God have control - they step out of the way so that the Lord can lead His church. I hate to say it - but they are wise to do so, it is probably step out of the way or get run over.

Finally they return to the place they departed from and they stay there a long while. This sounds like a home church to me. I think of it as their first mission and I wonder if this mission trip they have just come back from has stretched them - causing them to grow, causing them to seek God in a new way, they stay at the home church and they act as leaders in the church - they return to their first mission and they are happy. The Bible doesn't say they are happy, I am just inferring that.

So how does this apply to me -

First off - don't expect the headlines of your life to read as great days and successes, expect them to read as tragedy "the house burnt down", "kids were misbehaving", "outcast", "unloved", "rejected." But even when they do, praise God for always being there to help you drag yourself back into town.

Secondly - look for the half a sentence. Look for the things that make life sweet, even when they are buried between troubles and long travels - hang on to the good things that God has done and is doing in your life.

Thirdly - turn everything over to God - in whom you have put your trust. Let Him sort out the details of life. Allow Him the Lordship that He deserves in your life, you obey and then step out of the way and let him do the work. I'm saying that you listen and follow directions, and then you put the result in His hands.

Finally - rest and find peace with your first love. Apply that in all areas -Jesus - my deliverer, comforter, protection, friend, Drason - my husband, Music, Counseling and Children - my life's work- in all areas, return to and rest in your first love, it is where you belong, you will be happy and refreshed there.

Amanda

Thursday, January 1, 2009

A place to call Home

I have no home, It is hard to explain, but I feel it. I long for the comfort of the home I once had - predictable, happy, perfect fit for our family, I long for the home - not the mortgage payment - but the home.
Funny thing is I still have to pay the mortgage, but I can't live there. I feel so cheated - angry - and disappointed. I drive by what was once a beautiful home and see a burned out shell. My heart aches, I wish I could turn back time, I wish things were different, but they aren't so I stand in front of a shell and mourn.

One word in the New Testament used to describe the Holy Spirit is "oikeo" it is a verb which means to live or dwell. It comes from the greek noun "oikos" meaning a house or a home. As a Christian I am the home to the Holy Spirit.
I am the brick and mortar God chose to indwell, I am the house.

On New Years it is easy to look around your spiritual house and see where there needs to be some cleaning going on. We make lists, review life goals and ponder how we can make more money, lose more weight, and delight ourselves in our homes.

How then can I delight the Holy Spirit with His home?

I wonder if God feels about my spiritual home the same way I feel about my physical home. He still paid the mortgage, but he only sees an empty shell. He takes a walk through and can picture the way things used to be, when things were new, and feels cheated, and grieves the current state of things.
It is easier to accept what Christ did on the cross - the payment- than it is His Lordship - the building of a good house.

"Christ says ‘Give me All. I don’t want so much of your time and so much of your money and so much of your work: I want You. I have not come to torment your natural self, but to kill it. No half-measures are any good. I don’t want to cut off a branch here and a branch there, I want to have the whole tree down. I don’t want to drill the tooth, or crown it, or stop it, but to have it out. Hand over the whole natural self, all the desires which you think innocent as well as the ones you think wicked–the whole outfit. I will give you a new self instead. In fact, I will give you Myself: my own will shall become yours.’"*

I guess my New Years Resolution this year is simple, give over my spiritual house. Stop accepting payment and rejecting ownership.
Amanda

* Taken from :C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity, London: Geoffrey Bles, 1952, p. 155.