Sunday, September 9, 2018

Ripples



Ten years ago I joined a homeschool co-op.  I had just come off a year of being a homeschooling failure (you can read about it here) and was excited to join a group of like minded ladies.  So I enrolled my kids in some classes, I taught a couple of science classes and things were going well.

One day when we arrived at co-op, late as usual, a lady from the group met me in the parking lot. "Your son has really been acting up in Lauren's Spanish class, you really need to have a talk with him!"
This was news to me so after sending my other two to class I pulled the third one aside, gave him the mom eyebrows and told him he better settle down in Lauren's class.  He had a lisp at the time so with his sad little lisp he said "Sowweey Mom"  and went to class.   Whew - crisis averted.  

A few hours later someone else came up to me "Excuse me, Amanda? I really think you should know that your son is being very disruptive in Lauren's class!"  

I was a little surprised to hear this from a second person, especially considering he had not even been to the class yet today.  I managed to stammer out that I had spoken to him and didn't think it would be a problem any more.   

Lunchtime came and we were all sitting together eating our sandwiches.  Kids were happily munching away when yet another mom asked to speak to me.  She pulled me aside and said "You really need to do something about your son in the Spanish class."  By this time I was boiling.  I mean - did everyone around here know that my son had misbehaved in a class?!?!  What did they expect me to do, publicly flog the child? 

Later in the day, after the Spanish class, the teacher approached me and asked to speak with me.  She started by saying that my son had done better today, but the last few weeks he had been disrupting the class.  She said she thought it was possible that he had ADHD and maybe he needed to see a doctor.  

That is the last thing I remember hearing her say... although she did talk for a little bit longer.  When I replied I told her that I had already been spoken to three times about this by other women, I had corrected him,  and  her class was just a "fluff class" anyways, so I really didn't care if he didn't learn Spanish (I mean the kid could barely speak English and was 7 years old, he really didn't need a Spanish class) 

Lauren looked puzzled, but she was calm.  She apologized.  I don't remember if I apologized, I would like to think that I did, but we moved on. 

For the past several years, I have stood in front of many women and told that story.  Right beside me was my friend, Lauren.   She picks up where I stop and says "I decided in my heart that I was going to be her friend."  

Her decision, 10 years ago, has had a lasting impact on our lives, but not just our own lives - the lives of hundreds of families.  Her decision had a ripple effect in our community. We co-lead a ministry together.  You see, if Lauren and I had not made the choice to forgive, we would not have a ministry to lead.  In 2011 when the ministry needed a leader - there would have been none, and the ministry would have stopped.  But because of our friendship, we were able to lead a ministry together.  Over the 8 years we have been doing this we have seen countless families get the support they needed to homeschool.  We have had literally hundreds if not thousands of people contact us for help and support, we have seen families come together and have seen people accept Christ as their savior - all through this ministry.  

The thing is that sometimes when we make a decision, we have no idea, NO IDEA, how far reaching or lasting that decision will be.  We can not even fathom the depth of the good that God has planned for us.  We can not grasp that this little decision - sometimes big decision - sometimes every day decision - is going to be the decision that makes or breaks the next 10 years of our lives.  

So what do you do with that kind of knowledge?  

Psalm 119:9-16
How can a young man keep his way pure?    By guarding it according to your word. With my whole heart I seek you;    let me not wander from your commandments!
I have stored up your word in my heart,    that I might not sin against you. Blessed are you, O Lord;    teach me your statutes!   
With my lips I declare    all the rules of your mouth.
In the way of your testimonies I delight    as much as in all riches. I will meditate on your precepts    and fix my eyes on your ways. I will delight in your statutes;    I will not forget your word.
As much is there is good from the good - there is also bad from the bad.

What if she hadn't been kind? What if we had just ripped each other up with our words, hurt each other, or held onto a grudge towards one another?  At the end of the day, we would have missed out on some of the best blessings, a wonderful friendship, and serving the Lord together, we would have missed a major calling in our lives.  But more than that - hundreds of families would have missed blessings, friendships, guidance, and so. much. more.  So much that we can't even see or imagine all that would have been missed.  If we had made one different decision. 

How far reaching are bad decisions? Decisions to judge harshly, decisions to be cruel, decisions to break up friendships to harbor anger or resentment towards a brother or sister? Now imagine that not only was the opportunity for good lost, but then the opportunity for evil increased.  Evil decisions also have a ripple.  How much damage is done with foolish, prideful decisions? I believe the answer is the same - we can not even fathom the damage.  We can not even imagine the hurt caused, the far reaching pain and agony we cause with what seems like one bad decision.

1Peter 5:5-11
Likewise you younger people, submit yourselves to your elders. Yes, all of you be submissive to one another, and be clothed with humility, for “God resists the proud,But gives grace to the humble.” Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time,  casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world.  But may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you.  To Him be the glory and the dominion forever and ever. (emphasis added)

Live purposefully, intentionally try to do what is pleasing to the Lord in all things, and then to Him be the Glory!

Goodnight,
Amanda