First off,
If my previous post offended anyone - and someone emailed me so I know it did offend at least one person - I am sorry.
I really think this person misunderstood what I was saying, but perhaps I did not explain it well.
I think this person and their family exemplifies what Christian friendships should be. They do know what is going on in their friends lives, they do really care about each other, and they demonstrate that in how they treat people and care for people. While we might not agree on all the details - I do think your closest Christian friends should know more about you than surface stuff, they demonstrate that they care more about people than they do about popularity, politics, and superficial friendships. The point I was trying to make was that superficial friendships, where we as Christians do not speak with truth or love into each other's lives, are very hurtful to both participants - it results in an "I'm ok, you're ok." type of relationship - and then we are shocked when people fall into sin, or make mistakes that screw up their entire lives. Christian friends are very important to Drason and I, we have lived with Christian friends both ways superficially and with integrity) and we have felt very blessed to be able to make Christian friends who will speak the truth in love into our lives. Shutting down a facebook account doesn't mean we don't want friends - we just don't want most of our interaction with those friends to be through the internet. I have often heard "don't complain, change yourself." that is what is happening -sometimes that is scary for people, but change can be a very positive thing. These past 16 months have been FULL of changes - we have just started to go with the flow of the changes God is working in our lives, rather than trying to hold onto the things that we want. Sometimes people who change, or who implement changes, are viewed negatively because they are changing the status quo - but if we as Christians, or as a body of believers, refuse that change - where does that leave us?
Again, I am sorry if I offended - it was not my intention. God is still working on me, thank God for grace.
Amanda
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Saturday, September 12, 2009
More or less social networking
You may have noticed that I have shut down my facebook and twitter pages - you may have gotten a de-friending message - so sorry! I don't want to de - friend anyone!!!!
Social networking is interesting - and an interesting term. It seems the more I socially network through sites like twitter, myspace, and facebook - the less I actually know my friends.
I seem to have a lot of casual friends - people who used to be termed acquaintances until the advent of such social networking, and very few of these people really want to be a true friend. The problem is that facebook and twitter are cheap substitutes for real friendship; they entice the participant to pretend that all of these other people actually care what is going on in their lives.
Compare it to casual sex. - Why don't we do this?
A- it is clearly against the Bible
B- it would really hurt our spouses
C - it would really hurt us.
Compare that to having facebook as your primary connection with "friends"
If you are a Christian I think it cheapens our relationships with each other - how can you disciple someone through facebook? Not all friendships are for that - can you be a facebook mentor? Not all friendships are for that either - Can you be a cyber shoulder to cry on? Maybe...
Which would you prefer a cyber shoulder or a real shoulder? Heck most of my friends on facebook lived less than 20 minutes from my house - if they need a shoulder to cry on I should go see them.
I think it really hurts our friends - our real friends, and our friendships if the primary way we communicate is facebook - facebook is public - everyone can see it - and there are some things that you just don't want to talk about there. And it is a little degrading to post your thoughts like a billboard looking for a friend for hire.
Lastly it hurts us - it hurts us because we begin to accept the cyber world as the real world, we begin to settle for an acquaintance type of friendship.
Here is my challenge to all you who are thinking I am nuts right now.
Answer the following about your closest friend
How much money do they make?
Are they or have they struggled financially?
When was the last time they got in a fight with their spouse?
What do they fear most in the world?
What do they hope for most?
What main thing do they struggle with every day?
What are the name and ages of their children?
When are their kids birthdays?
How are their kids doing in school?
When is their birthday? - without the facebook reminder!
What do they believe about heaven, hell, God, religion?
What foods do they make well?
Are they allergic to anything?
Do they talk to their mom?
Have you talked to them in the last 5 days?
What are the names of their pets?
What are the last three jobs they have held?
I propose this - if you can't answer these questions about your CLOSEST friends, they aren't really that close to you. In all honesty - I can't answer all of these about my closest friends - which says to me - I need to get busy working on my real friendships - not wasting my time on facebook.
So to all you who now think I am certifiable, see you in the real world =]
Amanda
Social networking is interesting - and an interesting term. It seems the more I socially network through sites like twitter, myspace, and facebook - the less I actually know my friends.
I seem to have a lot of casual friends - people who used to be termed acquaintances until the advent of such social networking, and very few of these people really want to be a true friend. The problem is that facebook and twitter are cheap substitutes for real friendship; they entice the participant to pretend that all of these other people actually care what is going on in their lives.
Compare it to casual sex. - Why don't we do this?
A- it is clearly against the Bible
B- it would really hurt our spouses
C - it would really hurt us.
Compare that to having facebook as your primary connection with "friends"
If you are a Christian I think it cheapens our relationships with each other - how can you disciple someone through facebook? Not all friendships are for that - can you be a facebook mentor? Not all friendships are for that either - Can you be a cyber shoulder to cry on? Maybe...
Which would you prefer a cyber shoulder or a real shoulder? Heck most of my friends on facebook lived less than 20 minutes from my house - if they need a shoulder to cry on I should go see them.
I think it really hurts our friends - our real friends, and our friendships if the primary way we communicate is facebook - facebook is public - everyone can see it - and there are some things that you just don't want to talk about there. And it is a little degrading to post your thoughts like a billboard looking for a friend for hire.
Lastly it hurts us - it hurts us because we begin to accept the cyber world as the real world, we begin to settle for an acquaintance type of friendship.
Here is my challenge to all you who are thinking I am nuts right now.
Answer the following about your closest friend
How much money do they make?
Are they or have they struggled financially?
When was the last time they got in a fight with their spouse?
What do they fear most in the world?
What do they hope for most?
What main thing do they struggle with every day?
What are the name and ages of their children?
When are their kids birthdays?
How are their kids doing in school?
When is their birthday? - without the facebook reminder!
What do they believe about heaven, hell, God, religion?
What foods do they make well?
Are they allergic to anything?
Do they talk to their mom?
Have you talked to them in the last 5 days?
What are the names of their pets?
What are the last three jobs they have held?
I propose this - if you can't answer these questions about your CLOSEST friends, they aren't really that close to you. In all honesty - I can't answer all of these about my closest friends - which says to me - I need to get busy working on my real friendships - not wasting my time on facebook.
So to all you who now think I am certifiable, see you in the real world =]
Amanda
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Mary, Martha, Lazarus, Judas
These four don't have a whole lot in common - except this passage of scripture
John 12
Jesus Anointed at Bethany
1 Six days before the Passover celebration began, Jesus arrived in Bethany, the home of Lazarus—the man he had raised from the dead. 2 A dinner was prepared in Jesus’ honor. Martha served, and Lazarus was among those who ate with him. 3 Then Mary took a twelve-ounce jar of expensive perfume made from essence of nard, and she anointed Jesus’ feet with it, wiping his feet with her hair. The house was filled with the fragrance.
4 But Judas Iscariot, the disciple who would soon betray him, said, 5 “That perfume was worth a year’s wages. It should have been sold and the money given to the poor.” 6 Not that he cared for the poor—he was a thief, and since he was in charge of the disciples’ money, he often stole some for himself.
7 Jesus replied, “Leave her alone. She did this in preparation for my burial. 8 You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me.”
9 When all the people heard of Jesus’ arrival, they flocked to see him and also to see Lazarus, the man Jesus had raised from the dead. 10 Then the leading priests decided to kill Lazarus, too, 11 for it was because of him that many of the people had deserted them and believed in Jesus.
Every church has these people in it - and every person has these personality traits - the ability to be any or all of these four people.
Every church has some Marys - they worship extravagantly - their gifts are generous and without thought for themselves, they don't just sing they worship, they don't just give, they give abundantly, they don't just follow Christ - the ooze Christ all the time. The go through life with one foot in Heaven, perched at the feet of Jesus, just praising Him. I have been a Mary before, I can think of times when I was able to give extravagantly, I can think of times when I was able to worship whole heartedly, everyone has the ability to be a Mary.
But people tend to disregard and dismiss the actions of a Mary as irrelevant or flighty.
Luke 10:38-42
38 As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. 39 Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. 40 But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.”
41 But the Lord said to her, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! 42 There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”
WOW - Is Jesus showing some favoritism towards Mary? No - He is simply saying that here and now I have come to meet with you, put aside your formalities and meet ME. Marys meet Jesus - we all need to be more like Mary
The second person in the story is Martha - Martha is again serving, Martha likes to serve. Churches need some Marthas - someone to listen to Bible verses on a Wednesday night, make sure 200 kids get a snack at VBS, organize visitation of Mondays, every church needs about a hundred Marthas just to keep the place running smoothly. Marthas might be a bit bold - but they make sure the budget is balanced, they make sure the thermostat is set correctly, and with out them the rest of the people would be running around like crazy people wondering how on earth one Martha could manage all this!!! I have been a Martha - I have cooked like crazy to see that a meal was served, bounced a baby so that others could enjoy a special service, I have managed more children than I could count with a soccer ball and a whistle, Marthas are needed, just as Marys are needed. People tend to over look the Martha, no one is going to pat you on the head for cleaning up after a party, they get little kudos, and are often ignored. Martha's tend to act without expecting reward. We all need to be a bit more like Martha.
Next is Lazarus - now he is kind of tricky, he isn't worshipping, he isn't working, he is witnessing. Lazarus has one heck of a testimony. What would you say is someone whom you had seen dead and buried came back to life, and said to believe in Christ - I would be believing!!!
I have been a Lazarus - every Christian alive has been a Lazarus - once you were dead, now you are alive, I have a story to tell, a witness, a testimony and it is uniquely mine. Better than that - I have used it to win people to the Lord - I have shared heart aches, trials, and testimony with people to persuade them to believe. Something I try to teach my boys - you may never be the smartest, the best looking, the best at anything - but Jesus called you - and gave you a story to share with the world. You once were lost and now are found, were blind but now you see - you are the dead come back to life - tell someone about it! Just as we need Mary and Martha, we need Lazarus. Lazarus gets painted today just like he did in his time - like a zealot. Every on fire for Jesus Lazarus I have ever met has been rejected by their church as a little too out there. We tend to roll our eyes and say "there goes so and so again" I need to be a bit more of a Lazarus - I just can't imagine him shutting up for anyone, The Pharisees plotted to kill him, I wonder if that made him laugh.
Lastly there is Judas, Judas is a thief. Judas is pious, he has the right answers, he definitely hangs with the right crowd, but he steals from them. Judas has a sour look on his face, as he rebukes the worshipping Mary - we could have given that money to the poor. Judas plays politics - his words sound sincere, but in his heart he has ulterior motives, he wants what he wants. Judas is put off because he can't take some of the money. That's all Judas does - he takes, and takes, and takes some more.
I have been a Judas - I have sat back and taken a break so that others could serve me, I have thought poorly of the actions of a Mary or a Martha because I thought their time or money could be spent better. I have rolled my eyes at a Lazarus or two. The truth is everyone has been a Judas at some point. Every church has some Judas' some people who only take and never give, some people playing politics at God's house, some people whose words sound sincere, but they lack the action to follow it up.
The point?
I need to be a bit more like Mary, more worshipful, more extravagant, I need to be a bit more like Martha, more willing to serve. more mindful of the needs of others, and I need to be a bit more like Lazarus, more willing to witness, more open to share my faith with others, and I need to be careful of the Judas - careful to keep a positive outlook, careful to be willing to give rather than take.
Amanda
**partially adapted from Cast of Characters by Max Lucado**
John 12
Jesus Anointed at Bethany
1 Six days before the Passover celebration began, Jesus arrived in Bethany, the home of Lazarus—the man he had raised from the dead. 2 A dinner was prepared in Jesus’ honor. Martha served, and Lazarus was among those who ate with him. 3 Then Mary took a twelve-ounce jar of expensive perfume made from essence of nard, and she anointed Jesus’ feet with it, wiping his feet with her hair. The house was filled with the fragrance.
4 But Judas Iscariot, the disciple who would soon betray him, said, 5 “That perfume was worth a year’s wages. It should have been sold and the money given to the poor.” 6 Not that he cared for the poor—he was a thief, and since he was in charge of the disciples’ money, he often stole some for himself.
7 Jesus replied, “Leave her alone. She did this in preparation for my burial. 8 You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me.”
9 When all the people heard of Jesus’ arrival, they flocked to see him and also to see Lazarus, the man Jesus had raised from the dead. 10 Then the leading priests decided to kill Lazarus, too, 11 for it was because of him that many of the people had deserted them and believed in Jesus.
Every church has these people in it - and every person has these personality traits - the ability to be any or all of these four people.
Every church has some Marys - they worship extravagantly - their gifts are generous and without thought for themselves, they don't just sing they worship, they don't just give, they give abundantly, they don't just follow Christ - the ooze Christ all the time. The go through life with one foot in Heaven, perched at the feet of Jesus, just praising Him. I have been a Mary before, I can think of times when I was able to give extravagantly, I can think of times when I was able to worship whole heartedly, everyone has the ability to be a Mary.
But people tend to disregard and dismiss the actions of a Mary as irrelevant or flighty.
Luke 10:38-42
38 As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. 39 Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. 40 But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.”
41 But the Lord said to her, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! 42 There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”
WOW - Is Jesus showing some favoritism towards Mary? No - He is simply saying that here and now I have come to meet with you, put aside your formalities and meet ME. Marys meet Jesus - we all need to be more like Mary
The second person in the story is Martha - Martha is again serving, Martha likes to serve. Churches need some Marthas - someone to listen to Bible verses on a Wednesday night, make sure 200 kids get a snack at VBS, organize visitation of Mondays, every church needs about a hundred Marthas just to keep the place running smoothly. Marthas might be a bit bold - but they make sure the budget is balanced, they make sure the thermostat is set correctly, and with out them the rest of the people would be running around like crazy people wondering how on earth one Martha could manage all this!!! I have been a Martha - I have cooked like crazy to see that a meal was served, bounced a baby so that others could enjoy a special service, I have managed more children than I could count with a soccer ball and a whistle, Marthas are needed, just as Marys are needed. People tend to over look the Martha, no one is going to pat you on the head for cleaning up after a party, they get little kudos, and are often ignored. Martha's tend to act without expecting reward. We all need to be a bit more like Martha.
Next is Lazarus - now he is kind of tricky, he isn't worshipping, he isn't working, he is witnessing. Lazarus has one heck of a testimony. What would you say is someone whom you had seen dead and buried came back to life, and said to believe in Christ - I would be believing!!!
I have been a Lazarus - every Christian alive has been a Lazarus - once you were dead, now you are alive, I have a story to tell, a witness, a testimony and it is uniquely mine. Better than that - I have used it to win people to the Lord - I have shared heart aches, trials, and testimony with people to persuade them to believe. Something I try to teach my boys - you may never be the smartest, the best looking, the best at anything - but Jesus called you - and gave you a story to share with the world. You once were lost and now are found, were blind but now you see - you are the dead come back to life - tell someone about it! Just as we need Mary and Martha, we need Lazarus. Lazarus gets painted today just like he did in his time - like a zealot. Every on fire for Jesus Lazarus I have ever met has been rejected by their church as a little too out there. We tend to roll our eyes and say "there goes so and so again" I need to be a bit more of a Lazarus - I just can't imagine him shutting up for anyone, The Pharisees plotted to kill him, I wonder if that made him laugh.
Lastly there is Judas, Judas is a thief. Judas is pious, he has the right answers, he definitely hangs with the right crowd, but he steals from them. Judas has a sour look on his face, as he rebukes the worshipping Mary - we could have given that money to the poor. Judas plays politics - his words sound sincere, but in his heart he has ulterior motives, he wants what he wants. Judas is put off because he can't take some of the money. That's all Judas does - he takes, and takes, and takes some more.
I have been a Judas - I have sat back and taken a break so that others could serve me, I have thought poorly of the actions of a Mary or a Martha because I thought their time or money could be spent better. I have rolled my eyes at a Lazarus or two. The truth is everyone has been a Judas at some point. Every church has some Judas' some people who only take and never give, some people playing politics at God's house, some people whose words sound sincere, but they lack the action to follow it up.
The point?
I need to be a bit more like Mary, more worshipful, more extravagant, I need to be a bit more like Martha, more willing to serve. more mindful of the needs of others, and I need to be a bit more like Lazarus, more willing to witness, more open to share my faith with others, and I need to be careful of the Judas - careful to keep a positive outlook, careful to be willing to give rather than take.
Amanda
**partially adapted from Cast of Characters by Max Lucado**
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