What is a "shame bucket"?

This is actually a highly technical counselor term.

Yeah, right!

While the concept is not an original one, it is something that I used for years to explain to people why they still "feel bad"

Titus 3:3 says "At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another."

At one time we were all slaves to sin - I'm going to call this a sin addiction.

People who live in addiction have a "shame bucket" (or a shame 50 gallon drum)

A shame bucket is full of the most disgusting yucky stuff on the planet. Have you ever been to New York City and seen the gray slime that is all over everything? I picture a bucket full of that.

As people go through life they act shamefully and shamelessly. These are both bad.

When you act shame full - or shame filled - you do hurtful things because you feel that you are unworthy, too bad to fix, undeserving of love.

When you act shamelessly - you act with out shame- you do hurtful things because you feel entitled to do them, better than others, or like you should be able to do whatever you want.

Every time someone acts this way they add a little something to their bucket. Every time someone acts this way toward us, they add to our bucket. When you carry around a bucket like this, you wind up spiritually dead.

Ephesians 2:1-3 says
"Once you were dead because of your disobedience and your many sins. You used to live in sin, just like the rest of the world, obeying the devil—the commander of the powers in the unseen world. He is the spirit at work in the hearts of those who refuse to obey God. All of us used to live that way, following the passionate desires and inclinations of our sinful nature. By our very nature we were subject to God’s anger, just like everyone else."

So why is it as Christians that we sometimes "feel bad" because of past things in our lives?

Sometimes it is because we need to focus on the promises God has made:

Titus 3:4-8
"But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. This is a trustworthy saying. And I want you to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good. These things are excellent and profitable for everyone."

and

Ephesians 2:4-10
"But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!) For he raised us from the dead along with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ Jesus. So God can point to us in all future ages as examples of the incredible wealth of his grace and kindness toward us, as shown in all he has done for us who are united with Christ Jesus. God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago."

And sometimes Christians feel bad because they have started filling up the bucket again.
Just like any other addict, it is hard to put down the old and live in the new. It is easy to find yourself back in old habits, or even making new ones, that are not God honoring, but show us to be addicted to sin.

When a person has a few days "clean time" meaning they have not fallen back into addiction, I instruct them on how to keep out of trouble. I can tell them to find new friends, change their phone number, go to meetings( church), PRAY! But when someone has several years free from addiction, how do I advise them? The same way!
Go to meetings (Church), fellowship with like minded people, avoid people,places and things that will tempt you to fall again.

Even Paul struggled with a "sin addiction"
Romans 7:14-25

"We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God—through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law, but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin."

In the very next chapter of Romans Paul says:
Romans 8:1-4
" Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man,in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit."

and later...

2 Corinthians 5:17-19
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation."

So what is the point?
As a Christian there is no need to carry around that bucket of shame. We choose to pick it up and lug it along with us, and that decision leads to depression, anxiety and more shame.
Because we have been forgiven, we either need to stop focusing on the mistakes of the past and claim the blessing of forgiveness that has been given to us, - OR - we need to confess sin, put down the bucket, and then claim the blessing of forgiveness.

Either way as Christians :
"...we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago." Ephesians 2:10


AND finally, do the work! GO to Church, find Christian friends, focus on the positive, study your Bible, stop trying to find something wrong with everyone and everything (stinking thinking), Avoid people places and things that might cause you to sin, give up trying to control life.
If you were a counselor, would you let a dope addict control their own recovery program??? Not a chance!
If you were a recovering alcoholic you wouldn't hang out at a bar either, so stop hanging out by the water cooler to get the latest gossip, stop going places where you KNOW there is temptation waiting.

And do you know where all lapses begin? With turning off that little voice in you head(the holy spirit) that says "you know this really isn't a good idea"

Tune in and listen up,
Amanda