Homeschooling High School- part 1 - updated edition

 I originally posted this when my kids were in middle school and beginning high school - it's been a few years and an update is in order!

After the years of cuteness, fieldtrips, and educational material where I know all the answers to all the questions, came something else....

In much of the curriculum we have used there has been a definite shift in about the 6^th or 7^th grade.  Reading workbooks are now entitled ‘Literature’  Math went from long multiplication to fractions to integers to algebra.  The science book still has colorful pictures, but it also has experiments and science fair projects and is as thick as a few of my old college textbooks.  Days that were spent on fieldtrips to Dawes feeding the ducks, became hours that we could not afford to take off.  Time with my girlfriends while the kids played in the park became time with the kids one on one while we studied some long forgotten (to me) concept.  My patience melted under the added pressure of the tough topic.  In short, homeschooling became much harder.   

Up to this point homeschooling had been relatively easy.   Don’t get me wrong, my children didn’t leap joyfully from their beds asking to work on long multiplication while reading historical literature and eating whole organic homemade bread.   BUT, they were able to complete their lessons in a few hours each day, play for hours uninterrupted, pursue any topic which caught their interest,  help with a myriad of chores, and participate in many a field trip or activity.   

About two years ago, in April-ish – I began to purchase curriculum for my oldest and as I began to plan the coming year I realized that he was going to have a much larger scope of work.  So I called and asked a good friend some hard questions.

Is all middle school and high school curriculum this hard?

‘Yes, middle school is preparing your child for high school.  High school is preparing your child for college.  You certainly can take easier classes in middle school, but those lead to easier high school classes and perhaps not being able to go to college.  It could also lead to taking a year or two of remedial classes at the local community college.’  That was not what I wanted to hear.  I really wanted to hear that there were some super easy fun curriculum for Calculus that could miraculously teach advanced math is 20 minutes a day.  Sort of unrealistic, I know.

**Update- my miracle curriculum was not actually a curriculum, it was a tutor.  It seemed counter intuitive to hire a tutor (wouldn't that just take more time?) but in reality, it helped that they had someone who was a professional math teacher who could explain math in many different ways.  This sped up the time they spent on any one lesson and helped us best use our time.  I also believe this led to a more thorough understanding of the concepts covered than a "teacher in a box"  DVD's or online lessons would have provided for us.  We also utilized our co-op classes to the fullest.  Because the high school teachers were so very good at our co-op, it reduced the overall stress on me, and let me be mom!**

What if I don’t feel comfortable teaching it or don’t understand it?

‘You may not understand it, that’s ok. There are a lot of ways around that.  You can use an online school, a correspondence course, courses on DVD’s.  You can hire a tutor, enroll in a co-op class… there are a number of things that you can do to achieve a high quality education for your student, you just have to be willing to put in the leg work to find it and finance it.’

**Update - again I can't say enough good things about our co-op teachers.  Yes, classes cost money, but they were well worth the time.  We also used the local community college to achieve some of our high school requirements.  Because my children were about to test into these classes at about 15 years old, they were able to complete much of their "high school" work online via the community college and receive both high school and college credits!  Because the classes were online, they allowed for parental supervision and support and discussion of controversial ideas with parents before they ever had to discuss them with a professor.  

Will we have time to do fun things? 

‘Definitely, but they will have to be things that really matter to your teen.  You won’t have time to do every fun thing, but they will have time to pursue the things that matter to them.’  I have also found this is also true.  As my oldest got older he stopped wanting to participate in certain activities, but thrived in other areas.  We dropped band, and he committed to apply himself diligently to his lessons so that he could play football.   My second oldest dropped sports and excelled in band, piano and is now in a local theater production.   He also committed to complete his school work before participating in these extra activities.

**Update - Watch out for dropping too much too soon.  One child dropped everything in pursuit of a job, but really he still needed to be participating here and there with friends.  Later, he regretted his decision, even though he was successful at work.  It is important to edit, but don't edit out all the activities where you see your friends.  Find a way to give credits for those activities so that you can fee that you are having fun and accomplishing something at the same time.  Some kids are anxious to grow up - weren't we all??  But keep in mind you only get to be a kids once, so encourage them to slow down a little bit and worry about work when they are a bit older. **

Will we have time for chores?

‘Maybe.  It depends on how you structure your day.  You need to prioritize.  What is more important, having well educated kids, or, having a manicured lawn?  Think about the things that they are involved in, are they more, less or equally important to their education?  At this stage of life they are basically working a full time job to complete their school work. Whatever is added on top of that needs to make sense for their lives.’

**Update - In our home this practically looked like house cleaning about one day per week, so the cleanliness of the home depended on the day you visited.  Teens are still growing and need time to rest, keep that in mind when planning around school work, friend time and perhaps their part time job.  I found that I sometimes felt like the maid!**

What about friends?

‘Teens need a good bit of hang out time.  They have their own friendships and they want to hang out with their friends just like you want to hang out with yours.  As far as friends for you,  make time to be away from your kids to have time with your friends.  Your students should have a schedule so that they can be left alone, away from you, and still complete their work.’

**Update - Friends are an interesting creature in high school.  Some kids have dramatic shifts in priorities and personalities, don't be surprised if your 7th and 8th grade friends, or even freshman and sophomore friends, look very different with your junior and senior high friends.  By this time, you have probably already found a "good" group of friends, just be watchful.  Sometimes even "good" kids make very bad decisions, become rebellious, and abandon their faith in high school. 
For us it was also a good idea to associate with groups that shared our beliefs (more than just in the name) and we avoided groups that were in controversy or had unstable leadership.   We later realized just how much these choices had protected our kids from some very bad influences.**

What if my kids don’t really want to be home educated, complete their work, or drop extraneous activities?

‘Listen to your teen.  They know their lives, they know their likes, they know their dislikes and sometimes they have a unique perspective on a situation that you have not seen.  That being said, you are still the parent, not the friend, and sometimes you may spend an hour explaining your reasoning and suggesting a path, and they still won’t agree with you.  There are some things that are a non starter – like not completing school work, or not being home educated, but there are other things that could go either way – let your student make as many of these decisions as you can.’

If I could do one thing differently to prepare for homeschooling through high school, I would…..

The oldest kid is always the test kid.  When I realized how difficult some of the work would be we withdrew from many activities so that he could be at home studying.  As a result my younger two were also at home more.  This at home time became a more structured routine and gave them some very good study habits.  If I could do one thing differently, I would have participated in fewer extra activities and field trips (unless they fit into the preordained afternoon and evening free time) when my oldest was in the 4^th and 5^th grades and would have more carefully guarded the hours each day when school work needed to be completed.  The transition from elementary work to middle school work was much smoother for my middle and youngest sons because they had this structure in place already.

**Update  - no season is forever, as my kids got older and better at completing school, we were able to re-engage in LOTS of field trips and other activities, but not so many recurring activities.  We stuck with our co-op, but we dropped weekly music and karate lessons (we were blessed to be able to incorporate these into our co-op) This eliminated time out and travel time three days a week.**

The other reason I think I was so game to blow off a school day and make it up later was because my friends would be at the events.  I showed my children that I valued my fun social time more that I valued their school work.  This was not intentional, but in all honestly there were times when I should have said no, but instead I said yes.

**Update - I regret no field trips, no snow days, and no fun outside play!  I do regret sleeping in  some days, but other than that, those fun days made for the best memories.  You really can't mess them up until they are in middle school.  I encourage parents to focus on FUN in history and science, and on FUNdamentals in Language Arts and Math until their child is in the 4th or 5th grade.  Once you hit middle school there will be plenty of time for staying home and studying! Remember - they are only young once!**

Finally, I would suggest that parents who are dedicated to homeschooling surround themselves with like minded people.  So many homeschooling families stop homeschooling when their kids get to be a certain age.  My calling to home educate my children is something that isn’t a passing phase, it is a commitment.  When parents view their dedication to home education as a calling and not a choice, the option of not homeschooling is taken off the table and instead of focusing on issues you tend to focus on finding solutions.   

Support is out there for parents who want to home school through high school, but it can be difficult to find since so many families have planned from the start to home school only through the 5^th or 6^th grade.  Looking at an old roster I note that 11 out of 31 families, fully 1/3, have placed their children into the public schools.  I am not citing this to criticize families for their choice and I understand that God’s calling in my life is not necessarily the calling for their lives.  This post isn't an attack on any person who decides to place their children in public schools.  I point this out only to illustrate how important it is to surround yourself with families who share and support your homeschooling goals, otherwise you may not reach them. 

I have been blessed to have many ladies in my life who have home educated a child through high school, and I hope that I can be an encouragement to others who also want to complete this journey.

The Pit

"Why not?!?!"

She was a little bit angry with me.  As if her raised voice and scowl weren't enough of a reminder, she punctuated her syllables with her hand on the table top in frustration.  Frustration that I had not caused, but also had refused to make my issue.  Rather than engage her, I instructed her to speak with the person who offended her and told her I could not defend myself against the second hand statements she presented.  "Why not?!?!" was her question and quite a question she posed.  Why, would I not defend myself against false, second hand, gossip given statements?  Why would I not meet with someone to "set the record straight"? Why could I not even engage in this non-discussion?  Because many years ago I made a promise to my Savior that if he would drag my sorry carcass out of the stinking pit I had gotten into, I would NEVER crawl back into it again. 

Sin hurts.  It is designed to maim, kill, and destroy us.  Even faithful Christians can fall into sin, and not just a little sin, but great big ugly stinking sin.  Take Galatians for example.

Galatians 6:1
Brothers, if someone is caught in a trespass, you who are spiritual should restore him with a spirit of gentleness. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted.

Another version says if someone is "overcome" by sin. I think "caught" is a more vivid verb here.  I once heard a teacher describe this an an animal caught in a snare.  No animal likes to be caught and will thrash around trying to break free.  More often than not all that thrashing just makes a bigger mess, and a worse wound.  Don't miss the warning here - those who are spiritual - those who are above reproach, they are the ones to restore him, but there is the chance that even they could fall into sin.

1 Corinthians 10:12-13
So the one who thinks he is standing firm should be careful not to fall. No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.But when you are tempted, He will also provide an escape, so that you can stand up under it

Here again this speaks to the believer, sin is a real thing, even when you think you stand firm, you could be falling down. 

My sin was awful, I thought I was standing - really I was falling.  I thought I could get out of the pit, in truth I made it much worse.  Was I the only sinner that day, was I single-handedly responsible for the outcome of the actions of a group?  No, I was not.  But, I was solely responsible for my own actions and that was what Jesus wanted to talk to me about.  In the midst of the trouble, I wanted to talk about everyone else's issue "But she did this, Lord"  and "That one said this, they lied!"  and so on, but the more I pointed at others, the more the Lord pointed back at me.

I felt wretched, miserable, diseased, ill used and forgotten.  It took that low pit for me to look up.  Jesus was waiting, and as soon as I repented and began to be obedient to him, He pulled me out of the pit and put my feet back on solid ground.  If you've ever had a hard fall, and I pray that you do not, you will know the freedom that I experienced.  Even though there were things I had to take care of, it was like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders.  I was not only able to walk forward, but completely willing and happy to walk forward in faith.  This was about 7 years ago, and while I can't say I have been perfect since that time, I can say that I was fully delivered out of this particular area of sin in my life.

A few years ago I got a text from a very dear friend who wrote:

"Can I just encourage you that your obedience to not gossip ever is such a blessing to me.  I have conversations in which people tell me things about themselves that make me think "huh, Amanda never mentioned this when we talked about this." and I'm encouraged.  Good work, sister."  

What a blessing, what a beautiful good word to be spoken over my life.  What a wonder that someone could be pulled out of a pit, washed off, covered in grace, so much so that these words would be spoken of them.  I am truly blessed.

The downside of being pulled out of a pit is that in realizing that you were in the pit, and realizing that if you never want to go back, you have to then become obedient to what the Lord wants from your life, which is sometimes a difficult path to walk.  To top it all off,  it seems our Savior wants to use our pit experiences to encourage help others.  He pulls us out of a pit so that we can tell others that there is a Savior who is familiar with pulling people out of pits!

So, when someone came to me with a complaint about another, I asked them to stop, and go to the one who had offended them.  When another loudly and repeatedly, shamefully, treated me and others around me - we tried to explain the Savior, and then we taught Matthew 18, and when they were still brash and unrepentant, threatening, and rude - we followed Matthew 18 to it's conclusion, with as much love, patience and with an open door should they ever want to return.

Recently someone sent me an email stating they had been "made aware" (aka been party to gossip) of some things and believed them and as such I would be excluded from their fellowship. They further stated I was welcome to sit down and "discuss" this with them.  (I'm not sure how someone could possibly discuss gossip without being a gossip... but I digress)

When I refused, they spread their rumors to others, saying I had unreasonably refused them, making intimation that there was "more to the story" and that I had somehow personally wronged them.

To sum up - First, I lived in a pit, then -once out of the pit I repeatedly had those around me who wanted to live in a pit of their own, and my Savior, having pulled me out of a pit, bids me to go and encourage them that He can also pull them out of a pit.  Which sometimes resulted in their general scorn and dislike, which was then gossiped about (cause they never got out of their pit)  bringing even more to slander against me, even to my friends.

What does my Savior say about all this?

Luke 6:22-23
Blessed are you when people hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man.
Rejoice in that day and leap for joy, because great is your reward in heaven. For that is how their ancestors treated the prophets.

I am blessed.  Free from the pit, washed clean, placed in a place of honor, given a new name, a new mind, a new spirit.  I get to live from victory to victory.  I no longer stink of the pit, I no longer thrash about like a trapped animal.  I stand, because He is able to make me stand.  I am one with Christ, set free, no longer a slave but an heir to the kingdom.

Goodnight,
Amanda

PS - having excluded every name and circumstance from this post, if you know EXACTLY what I am talking about... someone in a pit has reached out to you! RUN away from the pit.  It is terrible, take my word for it, don't get into the pit.

Fire

In the forests there are tall towers constructed to be hundreds of feet tall. The wind causes them to sway just a little but if you can climb them, the view is amazing. You can see for miles. 

Imagine being on the Eiffel tower or the Empire State building and ripping open a feather pillow, shaking all the feathers out. Of course a few would fall at your feet, but the wind would blow most of the feathers far and wide.  Even if you tried, even if your very life depended on it, you could not recapture all of those feathers. Most would travel to places unseen, unknown. 

Now imagine that all of those feathers, were fire. 

Proverbs 16:27-28

27 Scoundrels create trouble;

their words are a destructive blaze.

28 A troublemaker plants seeds of strife;

gossip separates the best of friends.

Gossip will burn through life like a wildfire, untamed, uncontrollable.  Who can re-gather fire? It can never be re-gathered, it can never be taken back, just like you can never get back the spill of gossip. You could work tirelessly to undo gossip, you could spend hours, days, weeks, even years trying to battle... and it is like a single man trying to put out a forest fire.  

James 3:5-6…5So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire!6And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell.

I am pretty sure everyone has experienced gossip coming back to them about themselves. When that happens, it is always tempting to correct the gossip, to identify the originator and to put them in their place.

But if I try to run it down I will never find rest or peace, it would be just as impossible as chasing down feathers dropped from the tower spire.  It would be just as dangerous as a person who tried to fight a forest fire with a garden hose.

   I have grappled with this and realized that...

...when I  accept God's estimation of me, 
I stop worrying about what people say about me.

When I know I have been the topic of gossip, I often pray that God will recapture all those feathers for me, that he will extinguish the fires that have been set around me.

There is no way that I will ever be able to address it, no way that I could  convince others of the untruthfulness of the words spoken against me or my family. And in trying to undo the tangle of someone else's web - I too would strike a match and light dry kindling - I too would be guilty - I too would cause harm.

Psalm 62:5-6 NLT

Let all that I am wait quietly before God,

    for my hope is in him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken.

Goodnight,

Amanda

Potato Battery

  

The words "potato battery" have come up more than once on our homeschooling journey... Whether it's the annual science fair or someone experimenting in the kitchen, apparently turning a potato into a battery is actually a thing.

There are YouTube videos on how to make a potato battery, kits sold via the internet for 29.95 to explore the electric producing power of a potato.  You can make a "clock" from a potato battery, sciencebuddies.com will show you how to "produce electricity from produce" apparently they don't limit this phenomenon to just potatoes! I even found multi week unit studies called "Potato Power".  Potatoes truly can produce electricity!

So this morning I got up and plugged my laptop into a potato.... and guess what - nothing happened.  I felt a little miffed that my laptop didn't power on!  After a little more research I discovered that each potato can contribute up to .5 volts, while my laptops lithium ion battery is actually 15 volts.  SO - if I had 30 or so average potatoes I could potentially power my laptop for about 3 days - or until the potatoes went bad.  I think I'll go buy some potatoes....  

At this point you likely think I have lost my mind, how silly would you have to be to purchase potatoes to power your laptop!!  Yet, that is what we do- day after day - when we plug into the wrong source of energy in our own lives.

1Peter 1:23-25
 23 having been born again, not of corruptible seed but incorruptible, through the word of God which lives and abides forever, 24 because

“All flesh is as grass,
And all the glory of man as the flower of the grass.
The grass withers,
And its flower falls away,
25 But the word of the Lord endures forever.”
Now this is the word which by the gospel was preached to you.

One thing I learned when looking up things about "potato power" is that there is actually a group of people who research this and really believe that plants can power everything in our lives.  They are dedicated to the study of the power of plants.
Can you imagine how excited these scientists would be if they discovered a plant that would provide power, forever?  It would be all over the news, everyone would be talking about it, everyone would be buying that plant, caring for it, watering it, feeding it.

We have, at our fingertips, the word of God - which "abides forever"  and "endures forever" and we are not studying it! We treat it like it's optional.  We look around and see all the things in our lives that will last for a moment - all the things that will wither and fall away and we run to embrace them!

We have the ability to plug in to a power source that "endures forever"  Plugging into anything else is the equivalent of powering a laptop with potatoes - it is simply foolish. 

...and yet we do it all the time, everyday.  

When we are upset, do we take it to the Lord or do we take it to a friend in gossip?
When we feel distraught, do we cry out to him in prayer or do we cry out online and post?
When we are afraid, do we talk to Jesus or do we cower and give a place to anxiety?
When we are lonely, do we spend time with our Beloved, or do we scroll social media and compare?
When we are angry, do we hand it over to the Lord, or do we try to take control?

We know this already, we know that we have to plug into the source of life everlasting, and yet, we love our personal potatoes so much that we argue their benefit! We defend plugging into potatoes!

"There's nothing wrong with talking to her, she's my friend"
"I post online because I don't have anyone else to talk to - what would you have me do?"
 "Its perfectly normal to feel this way"
"It's my (husband, family, child) fault I feel alone"
"Anyone would react like this"

Is this really how we want to live? We know that all these things will wither and fade away and that as a believer we were made, and remade - for more than this!

Our friends, our social media followers, our rationalizations and justifications are small potatoes compared to the power of God, but if we don't learn to plug into the source of LIFE, we are going to find ourselves spiritually dead! 

John 15:5 - 11

5 “I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is withered; and they gather them and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. 7 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. 8 By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit; so you will be My disciples.
9 “As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love. 10 If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love.
11 “These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full.

If we will give up our potatoes, the things we love, the things we think give us power - we gain some truly powerful promises!
 
Jesus promises we will enjoy a productive life - he will give us new fruit that isn't going to spoil!
We will be able to ask for our desires, which will align with His, and receive them!
His love will abide in us!
We will keep His commandments - and we will be better equipped to keep them because we are filled with His love!
We will be filled with joy!.

This is the real power we need to plug into! Jesus is also very clear that without him, without this real source of power, we can do nothing!   The Greek word translated “nothing” is oudeis, from ou (meaning “not”) and heis (meaning “one”). Literally it means “not one thing.”

Jesus tells his disciples that he is their life source - the power for their lives (the vine). They are the recipients of that vital energy (the branches). What they accomplish in life (the fruit) is only accomplished because of the connection they have to Him. Then He says - If you are not connected to me, you can’t do one single thing!

You might stop right there and think... but wait, lots of people do things, lots of people accomplish lots of things and certainly they are not all connected to Jesus. 

To understand this concept, we are going to do a "word" study =) 

Anytime you see the word "word" highlighted, please understand that the emphasis is mine. 

The book of John begins with...

John 1:1-5 1 

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was in the beginning with God. 3 All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made. 4 In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. 5 And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.

Jesus is telling his disciples and us that HE is the foundation of life, He is the source of all life and all creation, all accomplishment.  The things of this world will wither, they will fade - but the Word of God will endure forever.  Not one single thing was brought into creation without Jesus direct involvement, and as disciples, we are to live life knowing that not one single thing will be accomplished without Him.

1Peter 1:22-25
22 Since you have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit in sincere love of the brethren, love one another fervently with a pure heart, 23 having been born again, not of corruptible seed but incorruptible, through the word of God which lives and abides forever, 24 because

“All flesh is as grass,
And all the glory of man as the flower of the grass.
The grass withers,
And its flower falls away,
25 But the word of the Lord endures forever.”
Now this is the word which by the gospel was preached to you.

The "Word" in 1 Peter 1:23 and John 1:1 - is the same word which is - Logos, many scholars believe it should be left untranslated as an actual name of God. I highlighted it in purple for this very reason.  The WORD is a name.  Everything we hope to accomplish can only be accomplished because of and through, Him - the Word - Jesus!

The second "word" 1 Peter 1:25 is rhema - meaning a spoken utterance, a specific word, it can reference a word of law, a definitive word. When it is used in this passage - it means the definitive word of God. God has the final word!  This word is also used in Ephesians 6:17

Ephesians 6:10-18
10 Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. 11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. 12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. 13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
14 Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness, 15 and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; 16 above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. 17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; 18 praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints

God has the final word, it is a specific and definitive word.

God gives us the power, through his Word and his word to meet every challenge that comes our way. 

Our power isn't from potatoes. We won't find the answers to the longings of our heart in the things of this world.  We can only find them when we plug into the power source for which we were designed.  My laptop was not made to run on potatoes, it was designed to operate with a lithium ion battery, we were not made to run on our own, to run to the fleeting things of this world, or even to run to our friends.  We love them, but we were not designed for them.  We were designed, created, from the foundation of the world, to be for God, grafted into His vine, and we can do nothing, not one thing, apart from Him.

Each summer my family takes a break.  We take a break from social media, from busyness from almost everything.  We literally unplug the computer, the television and we spend time - usually at least a week, but sometimes more, refocusing on the Word.  This time of separation from the normal everyday hectic,  distracted,  living of life -  helps us to reset, unwind, and to water roots that grow deep into the Lord and to spend time in His word.  We take this time apart to help us remember that apart from Him -we can do not one single thing.  It is my desire that each person who reads this blog will also take that time to remember, to unplug from all the distractions, all the potatoes of life, and rediscover the infinite power source we have in Jesus.

Many Blessings,
Amanda

Brownies

I once had someone offer me some brownies....

They looked really tasty - they smelled delicious -they were still warm from the oven, but before I could have one they said "Let me share the recipe with you." So I patiently waited - longingly staring at what my taste buds desired...mmmm

They began to describe their brownie making process, and I was only half listening.
First I combine all the dry ingredients, and I use all organic fair trade ingredients, flour, sugar, cocoa, salt, baking powder and I sift them together very carefully.  Then in a separate bowl I combine all the wet ingredients, vanilla, eggs, melted butter and then my secret ingedient, two teaspoons of fresh dog poop.... 

WHAT??!! Surely you don't really include dog poop in your brownies!!

Yes I most certainly do, and everyone just raves about how good they are.  Don't tell me you are one of those judgey "I only talk about what I am against" preachy Christian types! Certainly you won't let a little dog poop offend you!! I mean, can't you just eat the parts you like and leave the rest...

It's all mixed up together, how would I leave the poop out?

You are so easily offended.  All of your friends ate my brownies, the farmers market sells my brownies, and no one ever complains because of how good they taste.  Frankly, I am surprised at your close mindedness, dog poop is just a part of the world these days.

I really don't think eating dog poop is a good idea, I think I will pass.

They are really only like 1% dog poop! You sound like your trying to keep some law about not eating dog poop, there is no such law and besides, dog poop is everywhere these days! Your loss! Me and my kids are going to eat these brownies right up!

Is that really safe?

How dare you tell me how to make good brownies.  How is it your business what I put in my brownies in the first place, or what I feed my kids!

So in all honesty, no one has ever offered me a poop brownie in the literal sense.

But recently I have been offered several figurative "brownies" and when I pointed out that these things might not be a good idea to partake of, the responses were much the same.


1 - It's mostly good, just accept the good and leave the bad

This is flawed thinking.  The fact is that if the good and bad are mixed together it is nearly impossible to separate them.

1 Corinthians 5: 6-8
6 Your boasting about this is terrible. Don’t you realize that this sin is like a little yeast that spreads through the whole batch of dough? 7 Get rid of the old “yeast” by removing this wicked person from among you. Then you will be like a fresh batch of dough made without yeast, which is what you really are. Christ, our Passover Lamb, has been sacrificed for us. 8 So let us celebrate the festival, not with the old bread of wickedness and evil, but with the new bread of sincerity and truth.

How do I separate out foul lyrics and sexual topics from secular music for my sons? How do I separate the embrace and celebration of sin throughout a movie? It is not possible to separate these things. 

In another letter Paul also addresses this issue.

Colossians 3
5 So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with sexual immorality, impurity, lust, and evil desires. Don’t be greedy, for a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world. 6 Because of these sins, the anger of God is coming. 7 You used to do these things when your life was still part of this world. 8 But now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander, and dirty language. 9 Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds. 10 Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him.

Here he is even more clear - "Have nothing to do with..." Paul recognizes that it is not possible to embrace and also reject sin.

2 - I don't think there is anything wrong with it and "a lot of people agree with me"

Imagine those brownies were real, and in fact everyone was eating them and talking about how tasty they were.  What would be the result of eating poop?  You could contact parasites or hepatitis, or maybe you would be fine.  Would you really risk it?  Would you offer it to your child? If ingested by accident would you consult a physician afterwards?

1 Corinthians 6:12

12 You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you. And even though “I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything.

If you find yourself consuming something that contains things of the old nature mentioned in Paul's letters.  I would strongly suggest you not offer it to your children and you instead consult the physician at once, the Great Physician.  But also consider that maybe there is a reason that "a lot of people agree" with what you are doing...

2 Timothy 3:1-9
You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. 2 For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. 3 They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. 4 They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. 5 They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that!
6 They are the kind who work their way into people’s homes and win the confidence of vulnerable women who are burdened with the guilt of sin and controlled by various desires. 7 (Such women are forever following new teachings, but they are never able to understand the truth.) 8 These teachers oppose the truth just as Jannes and Jambres opposed Moses. They have depraved minds and a counterfeit faith. 9 But they won’t get away with this for long. Someday everyone will recognize what fools they are, just as with Jannes and Jambres.

3 - If you don't accept this as we do you are judgmental, close minded, legalistic, preachy...

I think I would call it faithful to the calling and Spirit that I have been given. 

2 Timothy 3:14 But you must remain faithful to the things you have been taught. You know they are true, for you know you can trust those who taught you.15 You have been taught the holy Scriptures from childhood, and they have given you the wisdom to receive the salvation that comes by trusting in Christ Jesus. 16 All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right.17 God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.

Paul encourages believers to "put on your new nature"  and to be renewed as they learn how to become more like Christ.

Colossians 3:12 Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. 14 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.

Being equipped for every good work, having peace in life and in the family, being bound together in love with fellow believers... these things far outshine any temporary happiness achieved from mixing it up with some dog poop brownies.

The truth of the matter is - I lose nothing by skipping the dog poop brownies of this world.

Why waste perfectly wonderful, organic, fair trade ingredients by mixing them with dog poop?  How much more valuable are the ingredients of our new nature, the precious promises we have received, the new spirit that lives within us, than these cooking ingredients.   

This isn't legalism, it's common sense, 

Blessings, 

Amanda

Discernment

It had been raining all week, but for the first time in several days the clouds parted and the pavement was dry.  My eldest, licensed for a whole week, sheepishly asked if he could drive home.  It had been so hard on him to have his licence and then be told he had to stay put because of the weather. I readily agreed to his request thinking it would allow me to get a few other things accomplished. 

My first thought when the phone rang was that my son should not be calling me and driving, because he hadn't had enough time to get home yet....
"Mom?"
His voice was shaky and he sounded like he was about to cry.  He said the van was "stuck" so after discovering he was OK, I asked him to tell me what happened.

"I was on my way home and I decided to take the gravel road.  I was going along and right there by the curve with the farm the stream was up a little bit.  It was like, almost over the road, but I thought I could drive through it.  I started to drive through it and it was like something grabbed the van!  It pulled me away from the road and I gunned it and ended up in the field"  

Miraculously, he hadn't ended up in the river but my son learned a valuable lesson that day about discernment.

Google says discernment is the "ability to judge well"  Biblical discernment is the ability to judge well regarding God's truth. As a believer we are called to be discerning..

Thessalonians 5:21-22"But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good; abstain from every form of evil."

The apostle John issues a similar warning when he says, 

"Do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God; because many false prophets have gone out into the world" 1 John 4:1

As a believer we are instructed to be discerning.  This applies to every area of our lives. Failure to use discernment in an area of life could lead to serious consequences - consequences that our heavenly Father would like to spare us from.  So how do we develop our discernment?

Step 1 - STUDY

 2 Timothy 2:15 tells us

"Study to show yourself approved unto God, a workman that needs not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth."

I was surprised to learn that "Don't drive though standing water" wasn't covered in Drivers Ed. I believed that because I sent my son to a 10 hour course he would be prepared to drive. This crucial teaching that my son needed to have before driving, was neglected. As a result, he was unprepared for his journey that day!  Similar things happen to believers every day.  Many churches teach some Biblical truths but avoid touching on anything that might be difficult to understand or upsetting to a member. This leaves members believing they are prepared for life, that they posses discernment, but sometimes severely lacking in Bible knowledge.  Then when they wind up "stuck" they can't fathom how this happened. Bible study is the only way I know of to develop Biblical discernment.  Study the Bible methodically, reading every book. Study with friends, mentors, pastors, anyone who will study with you. Take online courses, check books out of the library, spend time in God's Word. Seek the Lord as if your life depends on it - because it really does!

Unfortunately, many who call themselves Christians don't study the Bible.  This leads to embracing unbiblical teachings, things that you think you heard once ... like "God helps those who help themselves" or "Cleanliness is next to Godliness" or "This too shall pass" clever sayings - but not found in the Bible.  These are cute examples, but in practice many Christians can't discern between right and wrong, good and evil. They lack the foundational knowledge of the Bible and because of this they are overly influenced and easily swayed in their decision making by ungodly things in our culture.  Bible study, both personally and under the guidance of good teachers is necessary so that we can grow in our knowledge of God. So that 

"Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won't be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth" Ephesians 4:14 

Discernment is needful in every area of the Christian walk and God's word provides us with the needed discernment about every issue we will encounter. Without it - you might find yourself in a mess.

Lets think about this in comparison to my son's story. 

"I was on my way home and I decided to take the gravel road."   - Because I am an experienced driver, I would not have taken the gravel road after a week of rain because I would anticipate that it could be muddy and washed out.  The same holds true for the believer.  Experience and discernment tells us that some situations should be avoided altogether to avoid possible pitfalls along the way.  Should I counsel someone alone? Should I be solely responsible for the church finances? Probably not - not because there is something wrong with me - but because that road might wash out. 

  "I was going along and right there by the curve with the farm the stream was up a little bit. It was like, almost over the road, but I thought I could drive through it."  - Discernment identifies warning signs.  Several years ago I read a book "When Godly People do Ungodly Things" and I remember thinking it was going to explain a situation in my life where I had been deeply hurt - and it did - just not the way I thought it would.  It ended up helping me to identify some pretty serious red flags about this situation that I had missed - and if I had caught them - I could have avoided the whole thing.  I lacked discernment, so I learned some lessons the hard way. 

"I started to drive through it and it was like something grabbed the van!"   Without discernment, we usually wind up in sin wondering how we got there! It often feels like we were going along and everything was fine until suddenly, out of nowhere, we are in a heap of trouble! 

"It pulled me away from the road and I gunned it and ended up in the field"   We end up far afield of where we intended to be, many times afraid, rushing, and scared.  Discernment can help us to avoid these feelings, identify sin early, and avoid the snares of the devil. 

Some of the greatest insight on this is in 2 Peter 1:2-11 

Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord, as His divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue, by which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises, that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love. For if these things are yours and abound, you will be neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. For he who lacks these things is shortsighted, even to blindness, and has forgotten that he was cleansed from his old sins.Therefore, brethren, be even more diligent to make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble; for so an entrance will be supplied to you abundantly into the everlasting kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

This passage promises us that we have "all things" - meaning everything we need, given to us by God to lead a life of godliness.  This can only be accomplished through knowledge of Him - God and Jesus. (Bible study)  This knowledge allows us to escape corruption and through diligent study to add MUCH to our faith. These things will ensure that we are fruitful in our knowledge of Jesus Christ.
But there is also a warning here.  Failure to develop these things is short-sighted, and leads one to forget and fall into the same old sins.  We are called to be diligent, developing discernment, so that we will not stumble in this way.  A friend of mine defined discernment not as the ability to judge between right and wrong, but as the ability to judge between right and "almost right".  What an apt description! 

Blessings, 

Amanda

Gracious Words

“Encourage one another daily, as long as it is called ‘Today,’ so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.” (Heb. 3:13)

Each year ELCC has an anonymous online survey for our members.  If you ever want to know what someone really thinks of you, host an anonymous survey.  Our survey was, as usual, largely positive but I was especially encouraged by one comment: 

I want to be clear that ELCC is one of the BEST co-ops I've been part of and I've sampled a NUMBER of co-ops over a number of years and left dissatisfied for all sorts of reasons... I have felt welcomed with open arms in this co-op.... ELCC does so much to foster community and fellowship and it's work that is well worth it and reflects in the great, supportive community that can be found here.... ELCC does so much to help moms at co-op - from the resource library, helping co-op moms in need, meals, prayer support and so much more.... I feel like with the board at ELCC there is a whole group of people actively working to make ELCC the best co-op it can be. And it doesn't feel like the board has a "monopoly" on running things, but that rules are considered and well thought out for everyone's benefit, not just for the benefit of board members. In addition, the board and leadership are highly accessible and always have time to answer questions and address concerns.... I like that ELCC has a nice balance of both kinds of classes so every family can find just what they are missing at home. I love that ELCC builds in opportunities to serve the larger community needs. I love the monthly community lunches where we can spend time breaking shared bread together. I love that high moral standards are adhered to and my child will be largely in a safe environment with a shared value system.... I like that this co-op seems reasonable and flexible about policies and practices, rather than rigid - not strictly following the letter of the law, but instead the spirit of the law. I love that there are so many godly mothers that wholeheartedly serve in this co-op community and it is truly reflected here. I love that so many of the fathers are highly visible at co-op, praise God! There is nothing that warms my heart more than to see fathers committed to this endeavor and being visible week after week. Please thank these faithful, serving men. Their support and visible leadership can only make this co-op even better. I'm thankful for such a dedicated Board that surely works tirelessly behind the scenes to make this co-op exceptional in every possible way. I am also so blessed by such a vision that is cast upon this co-op....Thank you so much! Keep up the good work!

I was in tears reading this comment.  I felt so appreciated, so very loved.  I felt like I feel when my kids finally realize it's me whose been cleaning up the house and say "Thank you Mom!" It was gratifying and humbling to receive such high praise.  It made me feel valued and appreciated, like "Finally, someone sees what all this is for!"

In studying God's word I am seeing how vital encouragement is, and how it is so important God explicitly tells us to encourage one another!

Jesus is our example in John where he explains to the disciples "in this world you will have trouble" but the very next verse (John 16:33) He says "Take heart, I have overcome the world!"

Far too often we hear or read something along the lines of "there's trouble" but rarely has the next line been encouraging.  More than likely the next line is gossip or bitterness, the exact opposite of encouragement.

The New Testament reveals that encouragement was a regular part of the early church’s life together (Acts 13:15, 16:40, 18:27, 20:1-2, 27:36). They shared Scripture-saturated words with each other to spur one another on in faith (Acts 14:22), hope (Rom. 15:4), unity (Rom. 15:5; Col. 2:2), joy (Acts 15:31), strength (Acts 15:32), fruitfulness (Heb. 10:24-25), faithfulness (1 Thess. 2:12), perseverance (Heb. 10:25), and the certainty of Christ’s return (1 Thess. 4:18).

Encouragement was, and is, a part of daily life for a believer!

So, how can you become someone who uplifts and encourages? Here are some practical steps

1. Stop doing things that are the opposite of encouragement.  Stop complaining Philippians 2:14 , uproot bitterness (Hebrews 12:15) and get rid of gossip (Proverbs 16:28; James 4:11)  (Eph 4:29) These things damage relationships and make encouragement next to impossible!

2. Practice a habit of thankfulness and dwelling on God's goodness (Phil 4:4-8) Fill up your heart and mind with these good things so that you can pour them into the lives of others. 

3. Pray that God would create a spirit of encouragement within you, like Barnabas, who was known as "son of encouragement" (Acts 4:36) and look for specific ways to encourage others.  Not just "I like your sweater" but sincere encouragement, you can even use scripture in your encouragement!

4. Encouragement could be a card or note, a handshake or pat on the back, or any number of things.  Be creative in your encouragement of each other. Work to create a culture of encouragement where ever you are. (1 Thess 5:11)

5. Make a list of people who serve you and encourage them.  Husband/Wife, Pastor, Sunday School Teacher, Volunteers - reach out and encourage the people who make a difference in your every day life.  Much of their work is largely sacrificial, take long hours, and often goes unnoticed and unappreciated.  I am reminded of  Proverbs 14:1 "A wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down" 

I hope this encourages you today! 

Blessings, 

Amanda

Can you keep a secret....

"Can you keep a secret?"

Last spring I was stopped at a gas station on my cell phone when another mom whispered "Can you keep a secret?"  I made my kids get out of the car before she whispered through the phone that she was expecting baby number five!  I was so happy for her - she explained that while her husband knew and was joyful, their extended family didn't know yet - so could I keep it a secret - just for a little while.  I rejoiced in her happy secret and smiling to myself invited my kids to get back in the car. 

Then a mom asked me to keep a secret about her shy daughter who had a crush - she was so cute and nice - I told mom I would join her prayers for wisdom, and never say a word.  

And then last fall a mom had a secret, and she didn't share it, not with me, not with anyone. She knew it was a big problem, she knew she needed help, but she didn't share the secret.  And then last week another mom called me with a secret - the same big secret -and I sent my kids from the room and prayed a "Dear Jesus help me" prayer as the whole ugly secret came spilling out and even though no one else knew - God knew the whole time - and then I knew the truth that had been concealed in the fall and the hurt and harm such a concealment had caused. 

I may love a happy news type of secret - I may keep a "bear my burden in prayer" kind of secret - but then there is the truth that sin loves a secret.  And there is a secret that sin doesn't want us to know about secret sin - and I can't keep it a secret!

Sin loves a secret because in secret, sin can be justified. In secret, sin can convince you that "it's not that bad" or "that won't really happen." Secretly, Eve ate the apple as the serpent hissed "Surely, you will not die." Sin loves a secret because it can cunningly convince you that it's secret will be kept, that no one will know. 

Luke 8:17 For nothing is hidden that will not be made manifest, nor is anything secret that will not be known and come to light.

Many times secrets are kept out of fear, fear of rejection, fear of sin being known, humiliation... secrets not only fester in the darkness - but they become heavy - so heavy they burden the soul. 

It is my prayer that my fellow believers can let go of such fear!  

1 John 4:15-18 If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in them and they in God. 16 And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. 17 This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. 18 There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

Truth says that if I belong to God, He is for me, Christ is in me, and I have no more fear of judgement. I can admit sin, I can overcome sin through Christ's power at work in me, and I - who live in perfect love covered by the blood of Jesus - no longer have to live in fear and shame.  Sin doesn't have to be a secret that we keep - for ourselves or for others - because sin loves a secret.  In secret, sin can harrass the sinner, berate them, tear them down all day and night - like a sin secret so big it will overwhelm and consume you.  But in the light, the secret is less, and I don't need to keep the sin secret - because we are covered by a perfect love that drives out the fear of the sin secret and allows believers to surround the repentant sinner, the brother or sister, with Christ's love and forgiveness.

And therein is the tension of the gospel!  The beautiful messy everyday grace that we all need to uproot the sin secrets in our lives and outwit the cunning snakes that whisper in the night about how we aren't good enough and no one will love us, and life isn't worth living.

Christ says his load is light - and it's the light that drives away the darkness and it's the lightened load to admit we are all sinners - and then light to love one another in spite of our fallen selves.

Can you keep a secret? No - the secret is out - Christ has washed away our need for secrets and the only thing we need now is grace and the strength to love each other through all our spilling secrets.

Sin loves a secret, and fear keeps a secret, but perfect love frees us from all our secrets. Praise God!