Find your happy place

These past few weeks have been completely draining.  Physical illness and injury, combined with some troublesome relationships, constant car troubles, a FULL work load with many hats, a kid who is determined that he HATES math, and an ever growing stack of papers to grade..... I could go on.

I went to Bible study last night feeling completely drained, I needed to de-funk!  I had such a great time with that group of women.  They are so tuned in, God is using them to speak wisdom, healing, and health over my life and it feels wonderful!
Then today I learned that my Aunt had passed away last night.  Sometimes life feels like a roller coaster and all I can do is hang on. 

With so much going on it is hard to find time to be still.  But here is is 2am, and finally I feel still.  Be still and know that I am God.  Still.  still.

Someone asked me why I didn't sing anymore.  I told them I didn't know, it really puzzled me. IT wasn't that I didn't want to sing, I just didn't feel like I could.  Why?  It requires me to be still. If I can't be still I can't hear the music, I can't quiet my thoughts to really hear the music. I have to be still to sing. 

My happy place has always involved singing.  When I was little I would sing at the TOP of my lungs in our backyard.  I would swing on the swing set with my head thrown back, my eyes squeezed shut, and just SING.  I felt Him there, even then, such peace, such comfort, so still, so so still. 



Just listening to the music on my blog, (and adding a few accidental favorites) helped me tonight.  And thank you to my two dear friends who were so kind to intercede for me today.  I really needed that!!!

Be still, there is a healer
His love is deeper than the sea
His mercy is unfailing
His arms, a fortress for the weak
Let faith arise
Let faith arise
I lift my hands to believe again
You are my refuge, you are my strength
As I pour out my heart, these things I remember
That you are faithful God, forever


Be still
There is a river
That flows from Calvary's tree
A fountain
For the thirsty
Your grace that washes over me
Let faith arise
Let faith arise
I lift my hands to believe again
You are my refuge, you are my strength
As I pour out my heart, these things I remember
You are faithful God, forever.

I lift my hands to believe again
You are my refuge, you are my strength
As I pour out my heart, these things I remember
You are faithful God, forever.

Let faith arise,
Let faith arise.
Open my eyes,
Open my eyes.


I lift my hands to believe again
You are my refuge, you are my strength
As I pour out my heart, these things I remember
You are faithful God, forever.
Goodnight,
Amanda

If I had a theme....

Have you ever noticed that sometimes your life has a theme? 
This past week my life has had a major theme - patience and frustration. 

Macguines did his science fair project on Determination and Frustration and I realized as I was reading his paper how much he learned about this topic. 
He tested his drama group.  Some kids were really gracious about helping out, they were kind and friendly - a couple of girls were very rude - they even intentionally filled out the survey incorrectly because they wanted to mess up his project - talk about frustration. 
Thursday evening we had Bible study - it is a great study - we are talking about changing thinking to change outcomes.  Hmm - right up my alley.  The main point of the study is that our words and thoughts should be pleasing to God- but to get right words you have to have right thoughts - and right thoughts are harder than they sound.  We let out 45 minutes late and I knew we still had to assemble a project board - frustration.

Winterjam started early, packed out, random stuff going wrong - major frustration

What is the point of all this?  I thought I was done working on patience!!! 

Mac's project was on Low Frustration Tolerance vs. High Frustration Tolerance.  As Christians we should have a very high frustration tolerance because we should know that our Heavenly Father has things under control, but so often we let the little things drive us crazy!!!  Things aren't always going to go my way - I don't have to be in control of the universe for the universe to be working alright =)  Why?  Because God is in control of the universe, and he has what is the very BEST in mind for me. 

We stood at WinterJam for about 2 hours - it was uncomfortable - especially for us old people - but here are the comments I got from the kids:

That was AWESOME!  Did you see that guy escape? it was soooo cool!,  I really liked that speaker.  There was a guy in a red shirt who got saved next to me - we gave him the book of John they were handing out - he was really happy. Best-Day-EVER!

What a difference a little perspective makes!  Here is the best part  -after standing for 2 hours we finally got really Really REALLY awesome FLOOR SEATS!  We were literally close enough to the stage that you could almost have reached out and touched them.  The kids were sooo happy - one of the older teens looked at me and said "Totally worth it!"  and I sunderstood exactly what he meant. 

Sometimes things don't go the way you wanted, or planned, or even would have liked - and then they go way better than you ever thought they would.
 It is when I just sit back and enjoy the ride that God can work all things out to HIS glory =) 

Awesome day yesterday
Amanda